Recently, a question was posed to me…a question that I immediately answered because I knew the answer, but a question that also stayed in my head and I thought about a lot over the next several days.
Is God really good?
This question was not posed to me to cause me to question my faith, but rather it was just a really raw and honest question. Raw and honest because there are times in life where we do begin to ask this question. Because of the ridiculously hard circumstances that God is allowing us to go through. Because it feels as though there is nothing “good” in our life at that moment. And even because God appears to be silent in our life for a period of time.
Yes, I do believe God is good. The Bible tells me that he is good, and I can trust him. My faith is in him and on what His Word says. So yes, in my head I do believe that God is good.
BUT…
That doesn’t mean there aren’t moments when my feelings and my heart ask that question. Not because I want to lose faith, or that I’m doubting God. But simply because there are times when it’s hard to see it, so I ask the question.
It’s the same thing as asking “God, where are you?” during really difficult times. We know that God is there, but we don’t sense him and our feelings are struggling, so we ask because we are being honest.
Reading through the Psalms, David did the same thing. He begins the 13th Psalm by saying “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” Yea, it sounds like David is in a difficult place, and he’s struggling with things, so he’s being real and raw and honest with God about his feelings.
He continues by saying “How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all day?”
The truth is, YES, God is good.
The truth is, YES, there will be times we don’t see it or feel it.
And the truth is, NO, God is not scared of our real and raw honesty. He won’t get angry at us for being honest with him, or when our emotions are all over the place and we have a hard time feeling what we know in our head is true.
As I continued to think through the question is God really good?, I began to be reminded of the good he has done in my life in the past. All the ways he has taken care of me, provided for me, led me, and proved in some amazing ways that he is with me. I was also reminded that God sent his son Jesus to die for my sins…I don’t have to pay the penalty for my sin because Jesus took that on himself for me, so I am free from that and am now a child of God. That is HUGE!!! That alone makes him a good God, because he didn’t have to love me that much.
I may not see much good in this present moment of my life. Things may not be all that great right now. And I may struggle to see what he is doing, where he is leading, and how he is caring for me. But I can look at all he has done and be reminded that even if I struggle in this moment, the truth is that he is good.
And what’s really cool is that as I begin to focus on his goodness rather than my difficult circumstances, my perspective begins to change and I can even start to see some of the good in my life now. It may be small and overwhelmed by the difficulty, but it is there. He didn’t stop being good, or stop loving me, or stop caring for me, or stop leading me. He still is.
It’s during these times, when I can’t see or feel his goodness, that my faith in him is lived out. It’s where the “rubber meets the road”. Where I live out what I say I believe.
As Job said in chapter 2 verse 10, “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?”
God doesn’t do evil to us, but there will be times when he allows it in our life. It’s always for a greater purpose than we know…and until we see what he is using it for, it’s really hard to not get mad at him for letting it into our life. But God does have a plan, God is working, God is good, and he is using even the worst of circumstances in our life for a greater purpose.
As Joseph said in Genesis 50:20, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done…”
So to answer the question is God really good?
Yes, he is good.
But, I believe that what makes it hard for us to always see that he is good is the fact that we always want our life to be the way we want and planned or thought it would be. And when something really bad happens, or we lose something we didn’t want to lose, we begin to struggle.
It’s not bad. It’s part of being human. If you’ve ever struggled with that question because of a difficult circumstances, don’t beat yourself up. We all have.
I have. A lot!
I mean God allowed me to lose not just one thing in my life that I loved, but almost everything. And for 3 1/2 years I have been in survival mode, just trying to make it and figure out why God allowed it as well as where he’s leading me next. And during this season, I have struggled with that question more than once.
But during this season, my relationship with God has grown SO MUCH stronger than it was before, and I have learned SO MANY things that I may not have learned otherwise. He has also led me to meet people I may have never met otherwise, reconnected me with people who I needed to have in my life, and removed several people from my life that weren’t healthy relationships for me but I didn’t see it.
It’s not been an easy season, and I am still not sure what’s next (although I know what I want to be next), but I will say that I would never give up all that he has taught me and shown me and the relationship I now have with him.
So despite everything, even when I question what is happening and why he allowed it, I can still say Praise God! He is good…even if I don’t see the good at this moment.
He is good, and he will continue to be good. He had a plan before, and he still has that plan. He led me in the past, and he is still leading me.
Changes are coming to this blog soon…a new direction and purpose. More will be shared later this week.
Thank you for sharing your heart and soul. You are and always have been a blessing to me.